I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize