Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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