I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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