I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
