It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
