the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
