All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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