Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
