doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
