YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize