For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
MIDGETS
????
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
