she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
