is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
