i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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