One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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