Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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