Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
