You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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