i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
