just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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