One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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