Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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