god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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