Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
