he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
