Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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