Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
