I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
