There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
