She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
