There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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