I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
