I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
