You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
