It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
is it fun? or sober?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
