just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
