I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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