I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
