you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
