I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
