oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
