Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize