Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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