When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
