You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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