I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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