hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
