He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
We left the knife in your bed.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize