apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
