so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
